You’re fine. You don’t need help. You just need to suck it up and be grateful for what you have…
For most of us, this belief was drilled into us throughout our lives. No wonder we struggle with the idea of hiring a therapist or coach.
The whole idea of asking for help can unleash a fury of shame, fear, and doubt. Before I called my first coach, I remember feeling overwhelmed. I was shaking and my mouth was so dry I could hardly swallow. I mean, what if I was beyond hope? What if my coach told me the only way to be happy was to walk away from everyone I loved? What if I dared to admit my hopes/fears and the earth freaking swallowed me whole?
Things my clients say in their first sessions…
Something has to give. I feel like shit all the time.
Everything in my life feels like a chore.
I feel lower than I did when I was getting sober.
I worked so hard to get this beautiful life, but it feels like cotton candy on a humid day.
It used to feel like one foot was stuck in a hole. Now it’s both legs up to my knees. I’m so stuck.
Sometimes I can’t decide if I’m just bored or if I’m trapped in darkness.
I mean, I thought I’d have my life together by now.
I have a husband and three kids. Why do I feel bullied and isolated all the time?
I own my own company and have a beautiful family so why do I never feel like I’m enough?
I am my own worst enemy, but now my insecurities are costing me promotions.
Why am I so needy? I hate feeling fearful, lonely, and sensitive.
My kids are getting older and I have absolutely no clue how to just be me.
I lack the courage to change, but where will I be in 5 years if I stay stuck in this cycle?
Why do I feel so comfortable with dysfunctional people?
Why bother trying? I mean how depressing would it be if I found out I couldn’t change?
Help me, please. I’m parenting exactly the way my mom did and I know how crushing it is.
I have four kids, including a nine-month-old baby. My husband just asked for a divorce.
I look in the mirror and I hardly recognize my own reflection.
I got talked out of so many things in my life. Now I live in a void. But I’m always smiling.
I craved attention so I had an affair. My life imploded. How do I put me back together?
We lost everything: the big house, the cars, the vacations. I’m so fucking angry.
I said one of those very same things to my coach…
I will never pretend to have all the answers. I, like you, am perfectly imperfect. I’ve been through some real doozies in my life, both in my personal life and in my professional training. The skills I teach my clients are the same ones I apply successfully in my own life. I’ve got your back, I promise.